Mother's Day Gifts For The Truly Desperate

Now this can either be a great gift, or taken as a slap in the face. We leave that gamble to you.

Cheesy Card: Your smile exfoliates my heart.

Who said socks are reserved for Christmas. We think they make acceptably terrible gifts for any occasion.

Cheesy Card: The only thing that socks about Mother's Day, is that it's not everday.

Everyone loves a nice soak in the jaccuzzi. Unfortunately, your mom spent all her money buying you diapers, that she couldn't afford a jaccuzzi. It's time you give her the next best thing.

Cheesy Card: You deserve a spa day, everyday!

Clearly, a bath tub doesn't have the same panache as a jaccuzzi. But a jaccuzzi can't handle thearaputically aromatic bath bombs. It's all about looking on the bright side. Hopefully, your wife does too.

Cheesy Card: You're the Mother of all Bombs.

This is sure to save you some time to get an actual thought out gift.

Cheesy Card: I would spend all my time with you.

Remove at least one hair-pulling nuisance from your mothers life. We’re not talking about you, Bryan.

Cheesy Card: This is the last time I'll make you pull your hair out.

The gift of zen. Imagine this along with the jets and bath bombs. Now all you have to figure out is if it's better to tell her you broke the vase, before or after her bath?

Cheesy Card: You make me feel at peace.

Super simple, yet super effective. Becareful, she may try to hit you with the slipper after.

Cheesy Card: You've done so much for me. You deserve to unplUGG.

Why not get a matching robe for those stying slippers.

Cheesy Card: (See example above. We got nothing else)

Sleeping with glasses is almost as annoying as your whining. This pillow solves one of those problems.

Cheesy Card: You're the Mother of my dreams!

Seriously, that whining is intolerable. Wine makes everything tolerable.

Cheesy Card: Thank you for putting up with all my wineing

This can go one of either two ways. One, you could gift this to your mom, as a watch for yourself, so that she never has to worry when you go out. Or two, you could give this to her with a nice card that says something along the lines of "Everyone would want a mother like you. This is to make sure you're always mine." And cue the tissues.